I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
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