Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Randomize
