we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
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