jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
