Sry I called you an 8
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
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