chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
You bought champagne and told everyone it was because I'd just found out I was pregnant. How exactly is that being a good wingman?
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
I've Ubered to the bar three times this weekend to get my car but every time I get there I end up drinking. Still no car.
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
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