Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
Randomize
