I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
did you just send me my own nude
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize
