no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Randomize
