JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize
