he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
Ladies don't puke and tell
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
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