I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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