i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
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Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
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I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
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