So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
Randomize
