My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
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