This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
Took out half a tooth with a handle of jim beam last night. Apparently I can't walk and chug bourbon at the same time
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Randomize
