Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
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