i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
Randomize