Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
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