He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
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