As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
Randomize
