it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
Randomize
