he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
He really likes Obama...and Bill Clinton too. He said "I mean, how many presidents can say that they got head in the oval office?"
Soulmates.
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
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