if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
Quick, to the slutcave!
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
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