Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
Randomize