Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
Randomize