AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
Randomize
