his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
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