i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
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