you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
Randomize