Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
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No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
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You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
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