dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
I yelled at the cab driver to slow down because my unborn children live here, and pointed to my uterus. I think my message was lost in translation though because he immediately offered me his card...
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize
