I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
Randomize
