Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
time to smoke my breakfast
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
I just gave my mom some ones that look like they've probably been in some strippers cooter. Oops.
Haha. Just tell your mom not to smell them
Hey mom, most of this money I'm giving you is in ones. Don't ask why and whatever you do don't smell them.
Sounds legit to me.
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
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