moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
he high fived his dick after we had sex
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
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