My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
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