This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
