he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
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