Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
You made out with two different species that night
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
