i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
Randomize
