how hairy? two words: wookie tits
and this is why i am such an inspirational person, i am the Joel Osteen of alcoholics.
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Randomize