Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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