i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
Alive.
So much puke
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
In other news, I woke up still drunk and I think I literally just broke the Guinness book of world records for most bloody Mary's in one day...
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
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