There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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