Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
Randomize
