I just followed up on a noise complaint...only to find 2 girls in bikinis covered in jello with beer cans everywhere. I couldn't bring myself to bust that party.
I want to be a cop.
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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