Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
Randomize
