why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
Randomize