I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
Randomize
