in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
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