So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
