The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
Your cock deserves a montage
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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